People kept asking me, “What happened?” My listeners asked. My readers, my friends, people I haven’t worked with or talked to in years.
I wasn’t ready to answer. And then I had Amy Koppelman on my podcast (this is 2 years ago).
She could tell… I wasn’t okay. And she helped me. “Take a picture of your food,” she said. “I want to see that you’re eating.”
I was going through the worst time of my life. I was getting divorced. And I didn’t get better for a while. Maybe some of the residue is still there.
Amy came back on my podcast. And this time, we talked about my divorce…
“You didn’t think you deserved anything,” she said.
“Why do you think that? What’s the path I was going on?” I asked.
I wanted to understand what was happening to me. I became a minimalist. I got rid of everything I owned. I was moving from Airbnb to Airbnb.
“You stopped being a human being,” she said. “And I think it’s because you didn’t think you deserved even a couch.”
I don’t know if that’s true.
It could be.
I think getting to know ourselves is a lot harder than we think. Because nothing can be rationalized. Our brains are irrational machines.
But I can’t help but wonder the same thing…
Links and Resources
- Hesitation Wounds: A Novel by Amy Koppelman
- I Smile Back by Amy Koppelman
- I Smile Back (the movie starring Sarah Silverman)
- Ep. 141: Amy Koppelman – Write Something That Doesn’t Suck
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