My dating life has become nonexistent. It’s Spring and I’m not tolerating this anymore. Any advice to kick start it?

HOW TO KICKSTART YOUR DATING LIFE?

Kunal ‏ @pkunal2 My dating life has become nonexistent. It’s Spring and I’m not tolerating this anymore. Any advice to kick start it?

ANSWER: Dating is great. You get to go out with a girl (or guy) and its flirtatious and triggers hormones and you do fun things and who knows? Maybe true love can blossom.

It’s also very stressful (“Did I say the wrong thing?” “Does she like me?” or “ugh, I don’t like her, I’d rather be hanging out with my friends or reading a book that is on fire.”)

But if you truly are not tolerating the missing of dating then you have to kick in gear. NOW.

– Signup for tango classes

– Signup for cooking classes

– For reading groups

– Al-Anon meetings (every girl is related to an alcoholic)

– For yoga. For god’s sake, how can a guy who wants to date not go to a yoga class. In a yoga class it’s 80% single women who WANT to go out with you. And you get in shape while you’re waiting for the phone numbers to come rolling in.

– Sign up for every dating service. Every single one. And send out twenty messages a day. Every single day. And send IMs as well if the service allows it.

– And then, please listen to me, just ask. Ask everyone. Ask the girl who sells you donuts at dunkin donuts. One time I had to pay a late phone bill and had to go to some AT&T payment center. I slipped a note under the counter with the bill, “Will you go out with me”. Some girl from a totally different time and space and country than I ever was from. And guess what, she said, “yes” to this smarmy jewish guy. It didn’t work out. But it was a date!

– I would ask anyone who got in my way. Girl in the store? No problem. Waitress? On occasion. One time, in particular that I have in my Drafts folder. You have to practice your asking. It doesn’t matter what you say. A girl knows in the first two seconds. If you just say, “hey, can I take you out to lunch or something?” here hormones or pheromones or some kind of mones will know instantly if you are an acceptable evolutionary mate and will compel her to say yes or no. So what you actually say is not important. Here is a post I did roughly about that.

But, you’ve also given me a business idea.

What about a “reverse dating site”.

So you put up your profile. And you put up $100. And girls submit their profiles, etc to you. And the one who wins gets a $100 if she goes out on a date with you. She gets the money up front. If the date goes well you can each comment on each other’s profile, etc. I just outlined a billion dollar business in three sentences so if I don’t have every detail figured out don’t blame me. Figure it out and just do it.

But take yoga first.