What do you do when you can’t ignore the crappy person because you have to report to them? –@shoaglun
Here’s the issue with crappy people – they are the people that drive you crazy the most, the ones you can’t stop thinking about and the ones you are constantly imagining arguments, responses, counter-responses, things they did that were wrong, etc.
I sometimes wake up thinking about these things and it is a discipline (hard) to divert myself because almost by definition they are the people you can’t avoid. Bosses, colleagues, family, friends of friends, etc. That is why they are in our lives in the first place, else you would ignore them and move on.
The trick is to just not engage. If they want to provoke, or yell, or spit, or do something crappy, then:
#1. Be as polite as possible but don’t’ respond to anything provoking. Silence and minimal words are best things to do.
#2. Remove yourself from the situation/phone/location as quickly as possible.
Why be around someone crappy when you can try to be around someone you love?
An interesting thing happens. A few months ago I heard a phrase “the herx reaction.” It occurs when you start taking antibiotics. Sometimes you get worse first.
When you don’t engage, the crappy people go crazy. You know the phrase, “ignoring is the best revenge.” When you ignore or don’t engage with whoever is trying to provoke you, you cut off their supply of food and oxygen. They feed off of being crappy to you. Don’t feed the monster!
It’s up to you to stop feeding them. And at first they will scream in anger and hunger. They desperately want to be fed!
Then, bit by bit they will starve. Then finally, they will be extinguished. You will have trained them in that you do not respond to crappiness. And you will be more alive than ever.